Surah al-Ahzab (The Confederates) 33 : 53

Overview (Verses 53 - 55)

Observing Good Manners
 
The sūrah moves on to delineate the position of Muslims vis-à-vis the Prophet’s homes and his wives, both during his lifetime and after his death. It addresses the fact that some hypocrites and others with hearts full of sickness used to affront the Prophet by directing their annoying behaviour at his homes and wives. It issues a very strong warning to them, describing the enormity of their action in God’s sight and reminding them that God is fully aware of their wickedness:
 
Believers! Do not enter the Prophet’s homes, unless you are given leave, for a meal without waiting for its proper time. But when you are invited, enter; and when you have eaten, disperse without lingering for the sake of mere talk. Such behaviour might give offence to the Prophet, and yet he might feel too shy to bid you go. God does not shy of stating what is right. When you ask the Prophet’s wives for something, do so from behind a screen: this makes for greater purity for your hearts and theirs. Moreover, it does not behove you to give offence to God’s Messenger, just as it would not behove you ever to marry his widows after he has passed away. That is certainly an enormity in God’s sight. Whether you do anything openly or in secret, [remember that] God has full knowledge of everything. (Verses 53-54)
 
Al-Bukhārī relates on the authority of Anas ibn Mālik: “When the Prophet espoused Zaynab bint Jaĥsh, he served a meal of meat and bread. I was sent to invite people to come over, and they came in groups. They would eat and leave, then another group came in, ate, and left. I invited everyone until I could find none o invite. I said this to the Prophet, and he said to his family: ‘Remove your food.’ Three people remained in his home chatting. The Prophet went out to `Ā’ishah’s room and said: ‘Peace be o you, members of this household, together with God’s mercy and blessings.’ She replied to his greeting in the same way and asked him: ‘How have you found your wife, Messenger of God? May God bless you ,and yours.’ He then went to the rooms of every one of his wives, and each one of them said to him the same as `Ā’ishah. Then he went back, and found the three people still there chatting. The Prophet was very shy. He went out again, heading towards `Ā’ishah’s room. I am not sure whether it was she or someone else who told him that those people had left. He came back, and when he had one foot inside and one out, the door was closed. Then the Qur’ānic verse mentioning the screen was revealed.”
 
The verse outlines certain manners with regard to entering people’s homes that were unknown in pre-Islamic Arabia. People just came into a home without asking permission, as we explained in commenting on the relevant verses in Sūrah 24, The Light. Perhaps this was more visible in the case of the Prophet’s homes which were the source of knowledge and wisdom. Some people might come in, and if they saw food being prepared, they would wait to have a meal, without being invited. Some might stay on to chat after the meal was over, even though they had not been invited in the first place. They were totally oblivious to the inconvenience their behaviour caused the Prophet and his family. One report suggests that when those three people stayed on to chat on the night of the Prophet’s wedding to Zaynab, she sat with her face to the wall. The Prophet was too shy to draw their attention to the inconvenience they caused. He could not say to his visitors something that might make them ashamed of themselves. Therefore, God stated this on his behalf, because: “God does not shy of stating what is right.” (Verse 53)
 
It is also reported that `Umar, who was endowed with refined sensitivity, suggested to the Prophet that he should put up a screen so that people would not enter his wives’ rooms without leave. He hoped that God would order this and subsequently this verse was revealed endorsing his suggestion. Al-Bukhārī relates on Anas’s authority: “`Umar said: ‘Messenger of God! All sorts of people come into your home. You may wish to instruct the mothers of the believers to put up a screen.’ God then revealed the verse requiring a screen to be put up.”
 
This verse taught people that they must not enter the Prophet’s homes without first seeking permission. Should they be invited to have a meal, they may go in. If they were not invited, they must not enter awaiting the food to be cooked. Then, when they had finished eating, they should leave. They should not stay on to chat. Muslims today badly need to stick to this standard of manners, which has been ignored by many. Guests often stay long after a meal, and in many cases they stay long at the table after they have finished eating. Their conversation may drag on, while the hosts, who hold on to some aspects of Islamic manners, find this terribly inconvenient. Islamic manners address all situations most appropriately. We would do well to revive these manners in our social dealings.
 
The verse then orders that the Prophet’s wives be screened from men: “When you ask the Prophet’s wives fir something, do so from behind a screen.” In emphasizing that this is better for all, the sūrah states further: “This makes for greater purity for your hearts and theirs.” (Verse 53) It is not for anyone to say what is contrary to what God says. No one should say that easy mixing and chatting between the two sexes is more conducive to purity of hearts, and relief of suppressed instincts, giving both men and women a better approach to feelings and behaviour. We hear much talk in this vein, by unenlightened people. No one can say anything of this sort when God says: “When you ask the Prophet’s wives for something, do so from behind a screen: this makes for greater purity for your hearts and theirs.” (Verse 53) We should remember that He says this while referring o the Prophet’s wives, the mothers of the believers, who were all pure women, and to the Prophet’s Companions who were exemplary in their morality. When God says something and some people say something different, it is God’s statement that is right. Whatever is contrary to God’s statements is wrong and can only be stated by one who dares to say that human beings have greater knowledge of man’s psychology than his Creator.
 
The facts of life confirm the truth of what God says and the falsehood of what others say to the contrary. People’s experience everywhere in the world confirms this. Countries where mixing has reached extreme limits give ample evidence in support of this.
 
The Qur’ānic verse has already mentioned that peoples’ entry awaiting a meal o be cooked, without being invited, and their staying on for a chat, gave offence to the Prophet, but that he was too shy to hint that they should leave. Now the verse makes it clear that it does not behove any Muslim o give offence to the Prophet; nor does it behove them to marry his wives when he dies, considering that his wives are like mothers to them. Their special position in relation to the Prophet makes their marriage to anyone other than him prohibited. This gave the Prophet’s home its special sanctity and unique position. “It does not behove you to give offence to God’s Messenger, just as it would not behove you ever to marry his widows after he has passed away.” (Verse 53)
 
Some reports mention that one of the hypocrites said that he was waiting o marry `Ā’ishah! “That is certainly an enormity in God’s sight.” (Verse 53) Terrible indeed is that which God describes as an enormity.
 
The sūrah does not, however, stop at this warning but goes on instead to deliver an even sterner one: “Whether you do anything openly or in secret, [remember that] God has full knowledge of everything.” (Verse 53)
 
It is God, then, who will take care of this. He knows what remains on the surface and what is kept secret, and He is fully aware of every thought and plan. He has described such matters as an enormity. Let anyone who wishes try to do anything of the sort. He will soon discover that he is exposing himself to God’s mighty punishment.
 
Having made this warning, the sūrah makes the exception of some close relatives with whom the Prophet’s wives did not have to be so guarded: “It is no sin for them [to appear freely] before their fathers, their sons, their brothers, their brothers’ sons, their sisters’ sons, their womenfolk, or such men slaves as their right hands possess. [Wives of the Prophet!] Always remain God-fearing; for God is witness to all things.” (Verse 55)
 
These are the relatives a woman cannot marry, i.e. her maĥram. In fact it is lawful for all Muslim women to appear before these relatives in normal clothes, without covering their heads. I could not establish with any degree of certainty whether this verse addressing the Prophet’s wives in particular or verse 31 of Sūrah 24, Light, addressing all Muslim women was revealed first. It is more likely, however, that the order was first issued to the Prophet’s wives and then made applicable to others.
 
We should note here the instruction to always be conscious of God, and the reference o His awareness of everything. “Always remain God- fearing; for God is witness to all things.” (Verse 55) This is indeed the best guarantee that people will pay heed.